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Declined BCSO APPLICASHIN - ELWOOD JACKSON

Discussion in 'Declined' started by shootist, Mar 19, 2019.

  1. shootist

    shootist Member

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    Your Name:
    ELWOOD JACKSON


    Steam Name:
    WHUTS A STEAM?


    Date of Birth:
    12/ 15/ 1953 ...ERR I THINK.


    Email Address:
    IM NUT VERY GUD WITH TECHNOLOJY.


    Gender:
    MALE


    Do you have a microphone?
    NO. BUT I COOD GET ME WUN. MEYBE TREVOR HAS A SPARE WUN.


    Tell us about yourself (200 words)

    Elwood Jackson was born December 15, 1953. He was born in Bone County, Las Venturas to parent's 'Lizard' Larry and Mary-Beth 'Mudflap' Jackson.
    Mary-Beth (Mudflap), A very large, butch gal, was a world wide long distance trucker when she first met Larry.
    Larry would be concidered a 'Lot Lizzard' as he solicited sexual favours upon truckers in exchange for money.

    As the Trucking job entails, Elwood never had a stable home and was always on the move meaning he did not have much of an education but did necessitate certain useful skills, working with Trucks leading him to run a semi successful career as a mechanic later in life.
    Life on the road wasn't easy with his mother 'Mudflap' and father 'Lizard Larry'. In some instances Elwood would watch as 'Mudflap' would violently, Verbally and physically abuse 'Lizard Larry' in a drug/liquor fuelled rage.

    That would change one rainy night as 'Lizard Larry' abondened his family and climbed into the arms of an older, whiskey tongued, overweight, hairy knuckled trucker named Cooter. Last he was seen hopping in Cooter's truck and was never seen again, Leaving Elwood and Mudflap.

    Elwood and Mudflap parted ways a couple years later when Mudflap became involved with a stupid biker gang, whom she met through her addiction to cocaine that she formed from long distanced overnight trucking hauls.
    She would then abandon Elwood and become the 'Old Lady' to the greasy haired, dirty, stinkin' Chapter President of the biker gang.
    Sparking Elwood's hatred towards all bikers, Elwood set out to start his life somewhere else away from Lot Lizards and Greasy Bikers.

    Elwood always liked sandy shores . He'd made many trips to and from there as he worked Trucking with his mother Mudflap. 'Im gunna move ter 'sandy shores' he said, That he did.

    Elwood hitch hiked his way from bone county to blane county.
    After what seemed a year long journey, He finally made it to a place called 'sandy shores'.

    'This plase is purfect.' Elwood thought to himself.





    Why did you choose the Blaine County Sheriffs Office? (300 Words)
    CUZ ITS CLOSE TO MY HOUSE AND I DONT LIKE WALKING AND WALKING AND AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND WALKING AND
    WALKING AND WALKING.


    I ALSO KNOW SUM OF THE SHERRIFS IVE HAD MULTIPLE INCOUNTERS WITH THEM.



    Do you have any experiences in law enforcement?
    I DROVE A COP CAR ONE TIME. THEY SHERRIFS WHERE SO IMPRESSED THEY PUT THERE SIRENS ON AND FOLLOWED ME AS AN INDICASHIN THAT IM REALLY GOOD AND THEY ARE PLEASED WITH ME.


    How long have you been a member of Greenleaf Gaming?
    OH NO. I DONT TUCH THE DEVILS LETTICE.

    Have you read the Law Enforcement Standards?
    NO. ITS HARD FER ME TO READ SUMTIMES. TREVOR MOSTLY DOES THAT FER ME.

    In your own words, what does the BCSO do? (50 Words)
    THEY LIKE TO TRY TO HELP PEOPLE HELP THEMSELFES BY HELPING THEM TO BE BETTER PEOPLE THEMSELFS. CUZ SOME PEOPLE NEED HELP TO BE BETTER PEOPLE FROM OTHER PEOPLE THAT ARE BETTER PEOPLE THAN THEIRSELFS.
    ALSO THEY HELP PEOPLE FIND LOST PETS LIKE MY MISSING PRIZE WINNING SWINE.
    SHES A BEAUTIFUL PIG. UVE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE HIM. I DO MISS HER.


    Do you have any skills that can be useful in your department? (50 words)
    I DONT OWN A DEPARTMENT. I HAVE A TRAILER IN SANDY.
    I CAN RUN REALLY FAST SOMETIMES. IM A BRILLIUNT DRIVER.
    I CAN DRINK 20 BEERS AT THE YELLA JACK AND STILL DRIVE HOME FINE.
    I TRAINED MY PIG TO SNIFF OUT DRUGS SO U CAN USE HER FER SEARCHES. I DONT MIND.



    By submitting this application, you are releasing all above information to the Blaine County Sheriffs Office and its connected affiliates for the use of employment. You understand that submitting this application does not guarantee employment and can be declined or terminated at the sole discretion of the leadership within the department. You also understand that by submitting this application that your name will be ran through the in-game criminal database to verify your background information. Your employment with the Blaine County Sheriffs Office can be terminated by the department or yourself at any time with or without reason or notification. Please be sure to review your above questions before submitting to clear any typos, misprints, grammatical errors, and that the above statements are truthful and submitted solely by you, the applicant.

    If you agree to all of the above terms and have reviewed your application then please print your first and last name below before submitting.

    ELWOOD JACKSON
     
    Dustin, Cojo and Phil Anderson like this.
  2. shootist

    shootist Member

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    WHEN DO I START?
     
  3. Oloff Sanders

    Oloff Sanders Active Member

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    Application Denied
    Applicant is overqualified for the position of BCSO Deputy, therefore, will not be hired. I believe Legion Square plaza is searching for security specialists trained in mixed martial arts and the ability to continuously consume liquids for an indefinite amount of time. Individuals who can detect certain hazardous materials by smelling items directly and recognize through "trained" experience of such as spray paint, roach killer, gasoline, or anything else that may produce hallucinogens are given extra benefits. Other benefits include:
    • A cozy security sweater retrieved from goodwill that reeks of cat piss and depression
    • A state of the art security office located between bush A and bush B
    • Spare cardboard that may be placed down to enhance comfort on a solid surface or concrete for those hot summer days
    • Public water fountains/showers that appear out of the ground at 10 pm near the green stuff.
    • Unlimited overtime (pay starts at [Insert negative value here]
    We thank you for the time and effort placed into your application and wish you well on your endeavor for a job fitting of your special abilities, If you have any questions comments or concerns, please talk to Corporal Sanders with the BCSO for any inquiries.
     
    Cojo, Phil Anderson and shootist like this.
  4. B.McNamara

    B.McNamara fire329

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    @shootist I, on behalf of all of the BCSO Command would like to thank you for applying. However, due to reading your application and how poorly you took it seriously enough we will not be accepting any applications.
     
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2019
    Phil Anderson likes this.
  5. shootist

    shootist Member

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    ill try againe nixt week
     

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